Natural Steps of Grieving

March 1, 2021 | Categories:

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When you’re searching for the best funeral homes in Evanston, IL, you may feel grief and loss.

Grieving is a healthy and natural response to the loss of a loved one. No matter how much you try to hide it, you can lament, grieve, and mourn the death of someone special. Based on research on terminally ill patients, a team in 2008 argued that most individuals pass through four major phases or tasks during the grief journey.

Writing in response to the famous stages of grief model Dr. William Worden posited against the passive progression of stages of grief and instead signified that mourners engage in foul active tasks, namely:


Accept the reality of the loss

Experience the pain of grief

Adjust to an environment with the “Deceased” missing


Establish a lasting connection while embarking on a new life

A grieving individual can deal with these four tasks separately or at the same time – and the order can vary from person to person.


Task 1: Accept the reality of the loss

Hearing the news of your loved one’s death brings feelings of disbelief and shock. Your mind slowly processes the full weight of the loss until you surrender to reality. From the initial outburst of denial emotions such as, “I can’t believe he’s gone.” Or “It can’t be happening.”, you embrace the reality that the loved one has left the world forever.

Funerals often play a key role in helping you acknowledge the loss and confront the grief and sorrow it accompanies.


Task 2: Process the pain of grief

This phase is marked by intense feelings of pain and sorrow once you have accepted the loss. Worden believes that this task varies from person to person and that grief accompanies a range of mixed emotions.

Many people try to hide or run away from pain by delving into isolation. Remember, avoidance is the antithesis of the healing process and can compound your pain in the long-term. Don’t hold onto your emotions and embrace whatever you feel.


Task 3: Adjust to an environment in which the deceased is missing

Waldon argues that this phase – much like every other task – may be different for every person. It entails taking on new roles and responsibilities, both in your personal and professional lives. At the outset, it may be difficult but with time, you adapt to the changing environment and try to fill the vacuum in your life created by the death of the loved one.

You start seeing the world from a different perspective when a close one suddenly leaves you. The event may impact each aspect of your life, inside and out, and may take years before you completely adjust to the changed reality.

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Task 4: Establish a lasting connection while embarking on a new life

At this point, you already have found ways to cope with the grief and sorrow of losing the loved one and to move on with your life. “Embarking on” doesn’t mean forgetting the departed soul, instead it signifies finding the ways to keep their memory alive in your heart and mind.

The past memories and happy moments spent with them help you establish a never-ending, emotional connection with them even after going to funeral homes in Evanston, IL.